Sunday Supper

What an intense week.  So intense I am just now opening my laptop at home since the last post a week ago.  I think the fact that last weekend was so amazing, was one of the reasons I was able to make it through the stress and emotions this week had in store.  It's amazing how your life can get so upturned in the midst of other peoples life drama.  Luckily, my friend's divorce went their way, and I was not called in to testify in the end.  I am one of those people that fears doing wrong in front of authority, to the point that being pulled over for speeding almost throws me into a shaking fit.  Of course I love a hot guy in a cop uniform, but I'd prefer to be dating him, than getting pulled over by him.  So the idea of having to go up onto a witness stand and testify in court was absolutely terrifying, but something I knew I would have to do to support my friend and make sure the truth about their situation was what came out.  The fact that they were able to still win, and I didn't have to testify, was a huge relief.

The bigger relief...this was tied to my job!  My friend and his ex own my workplace, and if he hadn't won his case, I would have been scrambling to another job.  So, despite the stress of the week, at least one of my pillars in life is solid and becoming more grounded.  With a solid and advancing career, I am much more secure in moving and settling in to single life.  Living with an ex is a situation I always said I would never do, and here I am doing it.  Life between us is civil, but obviously not comfortable or supportive of moving on.  But with 8 years of stuff, two dogs, a cat and figuring out how life is going to work in the process of it all means that the situation is what it is.  I am moving forward and making sure i have my support systems in place.  I realize that the balance I was working so hard to be sure my ex-partner had in the last year, was actually what he wanted as a means to create his life without me.  It's amazing that my life was so on hold for him, and now I'm just playing catch up.  

I think the final move into my own place, with things set up for me...will be that step that breaks my doubt and  fear.  It was so weird having to tell my lovely neighbors today...I've been putting it off for 3 months.  I've avoided topics that they'd bring up, and just played it off...but today I had no other way to not share with them what was going on.  I will miss them terribly and I am hoping that now that I'm not moving to the West Coast, we'll be able to stay close.  I have decided this week that a shorter move, with less stress and financial burden is what I need to do now.  Keep some things stable...my job, general location, current friends...and if in a little while the west coast is still calling, then at least I'll be in a better place.  For now I am enjoying re-discovering the joys of being single, meeting people, and recapturing the joy that is life.  

I am committed to continuing to keep posting...and my goal this week is to post every day.  It'll take a lot of reminders in my phone, and possibly a few post it notes around my house, but I need to keep it up. 

For now though, I'm going to stare at some of these hot men.  :-)