MANdatory Monday

I keep missing days and then weeks and then when I get back on here I feel bad for not keeping track of everything going on.  Vacay was AMAZEballs.  For real.  No we didn't go on some crazy trip to Bali or Europe...just a simple trip to San Diego to show Mr. around all the places I lived and loved while I was a Californian...I still am deep down.  We drove around, hung out with the friends I call my family, and did some fun stuff like kayaking with shark, the zoo safari park, and plenty of beach time.  It was good just to have all that us time.  It's so necessary to validate the work and routine that life requires.  And considering how work has been...it was pretty much necessary for sanity alone.

On the work front...why does it seem every post lately involves work...oh yeah, it's overwhelming me and consuming my existence!  Interviews are popping up this week like comments on VH1 in the 90's.  Bring them on.  Some very cool opportunities though and just in time.  Really crossing my fingers for a few of them...which is weird considering how big these choices end up being in your life...what path they'll lead  down...what marks they'll make on my career...and what stamp they'll leave on my experiences.  For now I'm just wooing each recruiter and keeping every opportunity even and available for what is meant to be.  The benefit being that I have a new found ease to my days...like there is an end in sight to the madness that is my current work day and schedule.  So that's that...on to a better state of being and becoming more open to life and enjoying the now.

Since the new job and then the onset of this insane heat wave I've been running on such a spotty and   uninspiring schedule that I'm about to buy a treadmill and squeeze it into our condo somehow.  I just need that constant opportunity to burn the energy and wear out any anxiety and pent up frustration...and yet I can't see the good in running when it's a heat index of 110 degrees.  So, as I'm always looking for a good deal I'm going to keep my eye out on craigslist for a treadmill and see what options are out there.  Who knows, maybe i'll find something that doesn't suck and isn't a rip off.  We'll see.  But for now I run when I can and do what I can to stay in shape and sane.  Maybe staying sane is just not natural for me at this point.
Who knows...I can try at least. :-)

Ok...here's the good stuff...Start the week off right.

Friday MEaNderings

It's Friday and my second day off in a row without having to be out of town or doing something work related...feels quite strange, but in a great way!  Yesterday I did all my baking and cleaning and so today is just going to be running the trail, lots of dog time, and a dinner party at a friends house.  My kind of day!  Of course I work the entire weekend, but at least I had what felt like a weekend.  And I can't complain because once Sunday night rolls in, I'm off for 9 days!...7 of which will be spent in sunny San Diego with Mr.  Can Not Wait!!

Of course as any true pet parent can attest...I am feeling the anxiety already of leaving my boys for that long. While I know the friends I have watching them love and care for them...I just worry that they'll feel abandoned or something will happen while I'm away.  But that's just me and my neurotic self...plus my dogs are the best...and I'll miss them probably more than they'll miss me.

This has been a bit of a wacky period between stressful work weeks for both Mr. and myself...and some weird family health stuff going on with some of my family members back home.  It seems that all is winding down though, so hopefully once we get outta dodge we can just "peace out" and have an amazing adventure.  Then when I get back from that awesomeness I will go full on into mission "Find a new job before this one kills me".  I am the kind of person that picks a career/job and sticks with it...digs in and makes it my own and creates a family of coworkers that make it awesome.  Unfortunately, in my current location my position is set for failure with the current line-up of support roles and team members and there seems to be a black cloud over the entire place.  There is a reason my role has had 5 people in it in the last 2 years...which of course no one told me until they shoved me in and fed me to the wolves.  This location was not on the short list when I was hired and I do at times let my mind wonder to consider where my head would be if I had been at one of the three places I was hired for...whether I would be digging in and having a blast like I did in my training location. Or if I needed this challenge to spur me on to something I really am meant to be doing.

One will never know...but I just have to take what I can and push forward.  I do know that at the current pace I will not survive the fall...let alone holiday.  I was pretty clear in my interviews and conversations with the upper ups that I wasn't seeking a position that would have a negative impact on my personal life and my ability to live outside of work...and that's just where we landed.  Between the erratic and exhausting schedule...to the constantly understaffed support network...it's just a never ending shit fest.  While I know that I use every minute of my day and I always leave with things better than I found them...I am tired of never feeling like we're moving forward and not constantly doing things over...and over...and over.  There has never been a period where things have set and moved forward and I'm beginning to realize that I think that is just how this location is with the volume and level set for it.  I here my peers in other locations talking about their routines and days they have set aside for planning and preparations...which is a joke in my location because if I'm not on the floor making shit happen...I'm already behind.  Planning happens at home for me...in the car...on my lunch.  And guess who's over it.  This gay...i mean guy.

Ok...enough bitching.  I am going to sit back, watch a little netflix with my dogs...go for a run...lay out...and relax the fuck out.  Here's to a beautiful weekend for everyone...and if you're hiring...I'll take it.

Cheers - Rin